Sometimes it's OK if there's a "me" in "team"

That's the treat for me today.  Usually when I go for a run, it's to release and just not think about anything.  Not a thing in the world.  And sometimes, it's a time when I think the most.

There are times I feel guilty of wanting time to myself but today I felt like it was a good time to enjoy it.  When I had baby girl, everyone reminded me that my whole world was going to change.  Gramza and I deemed that wouldn't happen.  We would just be including another little person with us.  Yes, our world changed, all for the better but one thing I didn't want to happen was for me to lose my sense of self or forget about the things I loved to do pre baby.  I remember we were at a wedding and a family friend said to me, "take 30 minutes to yourself everyday.  You'll need it to regain your sanity, to breathe...just to get back to who you are again."  And boy, I took it to heart.  Yes, I definitely need it.  Any mother out there that says they want to spend every waking moment with their child, I believe there is some sort of fib when those words are uttered.  Yes, I said it.  I need a break sometimes and Gramza knows it.  I'm not ashamed that there have been times that I've just cried because just the thought that I can't raise this baby girl.  She's dependent on me.  But Gramza helps me, he gives me my 30 mins and I spend it wisely.  A long shower, a walk, a run, whatever.  Just time away.  It gives me sanity, energy, and keeps me healthy to love, adore, give my everything to my daughter.  Truthfully, I am getting a little emotional writing this but it goes through my head and it's OK to say it and feel it and sometimes just blabber it out here.  No apologies, no one said raising a child was easy and all about rainbows and lollipops.  But the good weighs the bad by a hundred times fold.

Which brings me to what I loved to do pre baby.  Believe it or not, was to run...be active.  Why?  It clears my brain, helps me think better, releases anxiety, and it's my me time.  It definitely is hard to find the time, but I'm trying to stay commited because I believe it makes me a better mommmy.  Call me selfish, but I desparately want my pre-pregnancy size back.  I know it doesn't come overnight but it's what I know.  So that's my project now, to get back to what I used to know and I want to start documenting it here: my eating habits, exercise, etc...just to communicate what works for me.  So here it goes:

For exercise, it's hard getting back into a running routine and is frustrating that I'm not at my pre pregnancy pace that I was once used to.  My solution, interval running.  It gives me a chance to start at a slow pace and gradually work my way up to a faster speed, then a chance to rest.  A plus is that it burns more calories than jogging at a steady speed =)  Here's my 30 minutes (if you stay 3 more minutes you can run a full 3 miles)

0:00 - 2:00: Start with a 4.5 speed level
2:00 - 4:00: increase to a 5.0 speed level
4:00 - 6:00: increase to 5.5 speed
6:00 - 8:00: 6.0 spreed level
8:00 - 10:00: 6.5 speed level
then back to 4.5 speed level and repeat 2 more times...and if you have more time, then 3/4 more times =)

For eating, I love to eat!  At the same time, I love trying to cook food that I love in a more calorie friendly way...What works for Gramza and I is making weekly meals on Sunday that last the week.  So I'll cook 2 meals that we can alternate.  I got the idea from my sister but we're cooking what we like.  I'm usually a light breakfast eater but I've changed it for the time being.

For easy recipes, I've tried crock pot recipes from here: http://www.shape.com/healthy-eating/healthy-recipes/9-healthy-crockpot-recipes-try-winter.  We really like the South American Pot Roast.

But for my breakfast I eat an egg white omlet with spinach and whole wheat tortilla (I sprinkle some hot sauce on there and it's just great)!  Lunch - I'll eat some South American Pot Roast (recipe above) and a few cheese it crackers, a banana and a piece of chocolate just to get my fix.  Snack - I'll have a greek yogurt.  Dinner (usually before 8pm) I'll have a protein and veggies.  This week it's Rotisserie chicken and roasted broccoli.  I love roasted veggies, so I'll roast anything (carrots, broccoli, brussel sprouts, etc).  For my sweet tooth I'll have a piece of dark chocolate.  I stop eating carbs by 6pm and it's fine.  And if I'm really feeling frisky I'll have one beer or a glass or wine. 

I feel like I should be smoking a cigarette now.  Not because I'm a smoker, but because I'm sitting in front of a window and typing on a lap top.  True Carry Bradshaw style.  =P

I had a lot of time on this blog because baby girl is at daycare.  She's been doing really well, so I'm picking her up in an hour.  I love that she smiles A LOT.  And it wouldn't be a blog without a photo of her =)


Nothing says hot pink zebra pajamas then a baby throwing up a gang sign (look closely at her fingers)  haha  She is my heart =)